Vatican Wants Imprisonment and Execution of Gays to Continue

Apparently Ratzie enjoys the photos of teenage boys in Muslim countries being executed. Leave it to the RC nutcases to equate protecting teenagers from imprisonment and execution to destroying "traditional marriage."

Advocate is reporting:

The Vatican has come out against a United Nations resolution that calls on all governments to decriminalize homosexuality. The resolution, Archbishop Celestino Migliore said, would "add new categories of those protected from discrimination" and could lead to the decline of heterosexual marriage, Reuters reported Tuesday.

"If adopted, they would create new and implacable discriminations," Migliore said. "For example, states which do not recognize same-sex unions as 'matrimony' will be pilloried and made an object of pressure."

France will propose the resolution this month on behalf of the 27-member European Union. The Vatican is not a member, but it uses the Euro.

The article continues here.

The Sin of Voting For Obama

As if it wasn't bad enough to be taught that going into or looking through the windows of a Protestant church was a sin, now there seems to be an outbreak of wacked out Roman Catholic priests who are trying to convince people that exercising their right to vote is a sin if they don't vote for whoever the priest wishes.

The Modesto Bee is reporting:

Parishioners of St. Joseph's Catholic Church in Modesto have been told they should consider going to confession if they voted for Barack Obama, because of the president-elect's position condoning abortion.

"If you are one of the 54 percent of Catholics who voted for [a pro-choice] candidate, you were clear on his position and you knew the gravity of the question, I urge you to go to confession before receiving communion. Don't risk losing your state of grace by receiving sacrilegiously," the Rev. Joseph Illo, pastor of St. Joseph's, wrote in a letter dated Nov. 21.

The letter was sent to more than 15,000 members of the St. Joseph's parish. It is one of 34 parishes in the Stockton Diocese, which has more than 200,000 members in Stanislaus, San Joaquin and four other counties.

Illo also delivered this message in a homily.

The article continues here.

BTW, it is true that Obama condones abortion? How does this priest know that? Or is he making an assumption?

Florida Adoption Ban Unconstitutional

A Florida court delivered another pie to Anita Bryant today when it ruled the state's ban on gay adoption unconstitutional.

''This is the forum where we try to heal children, find permanent families for them so they can get another chance at what every child should know and feel from birth, and go on to lead productive lives,'' Lederman said in court before releasing the order. ``We pray for them to thrive, but that is a word we rarely hear in dependency court.''

''These children are thriving;

The Miami Herald had the details.

Armband Religion

Well, sombody ultimately had to acknowedge the elephant in the room.

Today it finally happened in conservative Washington Post columnist Kathleen Parker's editorial, Giving Up on God.

As Republicans sort out the reasons for their defeat, they likely will overlook or dismiss the gorilla in the pulpit.

Three little letters, great big problem: G-O-D.

I'm bathing in holy water as I type.

To be more specific, the evangelical, right-wing, oogedy-boogedy branch of the GOP is what ails the erstwhile conservative party and will continue to afflict and marginalize its constituents if reckoning doesn't soon cometh.

Simply put: Armband religion is killing the Republican Party. And, the truth -- as long as we're setting ourselves free -- is that if one were to eavesdrop on private conversations among the party intelligentsia, one would hear precisely that.

The choir has become absurdly off-key, and many Republicans know it.

But they need those votes!

So it has been for the Grand Old Party since the 1980s or so, as it has become increasingly beholden to an element that used to be relegated to wooden crates on street corners.

Short break as writer ties blindfold and smokes her last cigarette.

Which is to say, the GOP has surrendered its high ground to its lowest brows. In the process, the party has alienated its non-base constituents, including other people of faith (those who prefer a more private approach to worship), as well as secularists and conservative-leaning Democrats who otherwise might be tempted to cross the aisle.

Do be sure to read this excellent article in its entirety.

Cinemark CEO Donated $9,999.00 To Strip California GLBTs Of Civil Rights

Alan Stock, CEO of Cinemark Theaters, gave $9,999.00 to the campaign of deception and defamation leading to the revocation of civil rights of California GLBTs.

Here is list of US Cinemark Theaters.

You know what to do.

Sworn Complaint Filed Against Mormon Church with California FPPC and 2 State Attorneys General

From Californians Against Hate

Fred Karger, Founder of Californians Against Hate, today filed a Sworn Complaint with the Enforcement Division of the Fair Political Practices Commission (FPPC). In the complaint he accused The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS) of not reporting numerous non monetary contributions to ProtectMarriage.com – Yes on 8, A Project of California Renewal I.D. # 1302592.

Karger contends that The Mormon Church organized phone banks from Utah and Idaho, sent direct mail to voters, transported people to California over several weekends, used the LDS NewsRoom to send out News Releases to promote their activities, walked precincts, ran a speakers bureau, distributed thousands of lawn signs and other campaign material, organized a “surge to election day,” had Church leaders travel to California, set up very elaborate web sites, produced at least 9 commercials and 4 other video broadcasts and conducted at least 2 satellite simulcasts over 5 Western states. All of these actions were geared toward nonmembers.

In addition to the formal FPPC complaint, a letter was also sent today to FPPC Chairman Ross Johnson, California Attorney General Edmund G. Brown, Jr. and Utah Attorney General Mark Shurtleff expanding on the complaint.

In the letter, a copy of which is below, Karger stated that 2 other organizations that were also involved in the Yes on Prop 8 campaign, reported substantial non monetary contributions to ProtectMarriage.com. The National Organization for Marriage (NOM) of Princeton, New Jersey reported $210,634,75 and James Dobson’s Focus on the Family of Colorado Springs, Colorado reported $83,790.00. No non monetary contributions could be found from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Here is the full text of the letter:

Bible Prophecy on Mormons and Proposition 8

From one of the Lavender Wolves ...

It is not often that the Bible reaches forward into the future to admonish a group of people who claim to revere that document, but it does exactly that when condemning the Mormons (Latter Day Saints) for their support of Proposition 8 and other DOMAs.

1 Timothy 4:1-5 (King James Version)
King James Version (KJV)
1 Timothy 4
1Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils;
2Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron;
3Forbidding to marry, and commanding to abstain from meats, which God hath created to be received with thanksgiving of them which believe and know the truth.
4For every creature of God is good, and nothing to be refused, if it be received with thanksgiving:
5For it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer.

The Mormons (Latter Day Saints) pride themselves on being the ones spoken of as being in the latter times. It is even incorporated in ther name -- Latter Day Saints. So clearly this passage speaks to them.

It also directly addresses their support of Proposition 8 and other DOMAs. When speaking of those people in latter days (and latter days are NOW) who wish to forbid others to marry, the Bible says they: "shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils; Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron; Forbidding to marry

The names of those Latter Day Saints who worked so hard to destroy the lives and marriages of others are written large in the Book of Shame.

We can only hope and pray that they will come to their senses, throw out those leaders who have misled them so badly, and make restitution to those they have harmed.

Copyright November 13, 2008, by John Richards. All rights reserved,
except that free distribution via any medium is permitted as long as
author's credit is given and no profit is involved.

Right Wing Nutcase Peter Labarbera Has Hissy Fit Over Obama's Meetings with Bishop Gene Robinson

From the good folks at Right Wing Watch:

Militant anti-gay activist Peter LaBarbera is not happy that Barack Obama has been talking to Rev. Gene Robinson … in fact, this simple act along is enough to convince LaBarbera that Obama is “anti-Christian” and out to undermine the Christian faith:

A conservative Christian activist says it's a sad omen for the Obama administration and the United States that Barack Obama has been seeking guidance from the Episcopal Church's first openly homosexual bishop.

The Times of London reports that the president-elect sought out New Hampshire homosexual bishop Vicki Gene Robinson for advice three times during his presidential campaign. Robinson, whose ordination in the Episcopal Church has caused a deep rift within the Anglican Communion, was reportedly sought out by Obama to discuss what it feels like to be "first."

Robinson notes in their three private conversations, Obama voiced his support for "equal civil rights" for homosexuals and described the election as a "religious experience." Peter LaBarbera, president of Americans for Truth About Homosexuality, believes Obama's consultations with Robinson show the true tenor of his upcoming administration.

"It looks like Billy Graham has been replaced by a gay bishop. We're moving to, perhaps, our first anti-Christian president; it's beyond post-Christian. Gene Robinson advocates homosexuality as part of the Christian experience," he explains. "Now Bible-believing Christians cannot accept that. Homosexual practice is sinful, as taught by the scriptures. This man [Obama] pretends to be faithful to Christianity, even as he works very hard to undermine it."

Chrissy and Sarah

A number of years ago some friends of ours got an adorable miniature Dachshund puppy during the holiday season and named her Chrissy (for Christmas). Chrissy had the daunting task of filling in the space left by their matron Weimaraner, Madge, who has passed on earlier that year. Chrissy had no trouble at all, and performed her task brilliantly.

As the years went on, Chrissy developed some back trouble and eventually some nerve damage that has left her with the predicament of being fecally incontinent. Our friends came over for dinner a couple of weeks ago and told us about this new development in Chrissy's health. They left an indelible image in my mind when they described how poor little Chrissy just drops little bits of poop at random as she walks around the house.

And then along came the Katie Couric interviews with Sarah Palin.

Palin keeps reminding me of poor little Chrissy. Every time she opens her mouth, little bits of ... er ... something ... just keep dropping out at random.

So while you're watching tonight's debate, do take a moment to think about adorable little Chrissy and her current troubles.

All You Need To Know About Sarah Palin

1. How she feels about the duties of the Vice President of the USA.

2. What John McCain likes most about her (watch his eyes).

3. McCain's staff assures us that she can learn on the job and that McCain will still be alive after four years of this on-the-job training.

From the New York Times:

Mr. McCain’s advisers said Friday that Mr. McCain was well aware that Ms. Palin would be criticized for her lack of foreign policy experience, but that he viewed her as exceptionally talented and intelligent and that he felt she would be able to be educated quickly.

“She’s going to learn national security at the foot of the master for the next four years, and most doctors think that he’ll be around at least that long,” said Charlie Black, one of Mr. McCain’s top advisers, making light of concerns about Mr. McCain’s health, which Mr. McCain’s doctors reported as excellent in May.

The Heterosexist Agenda

The homophobes often rant about something called The Homosexual Agenda. Some years ago I became curious about it and did some research. As suspected, the thing is basically an invention of right wing homophobes who took a satirical piece, omitted some key information, and then went on their rant rampage, even reading it into the Congressional Record. You can read the summary of that research here.

The name of the author of the original satirical piece is Michael Swift. Amusingly, several years ago I received a rather stressed-sounding e-mail from another young man with the same name. His father had Googled his name and found it associated with The Gay Agenda. Once I sorted it all out for him, he was quite nice and understanding about it. In fact he was quite disgusted with what the right wing nutcases had done.

And now, the good people at Right Wing Watch have informed us that the wingnuts have published another agenda, and this time it is their own.

How To Be a Right-Winger in 25 Easy Steps

All of those potential right-wing candidates out there who are searching for a ready-made agenda to run on are in luck, because today the Family Research Council unveiled a report entitled "25 Pro-Family Policy Goals for the Nation."

As FRC explains, the report is designed to serve as a blueprint for candidates, though it'll work for pastors, voters, and plain-old citizens as well:

The document you hold in your hands can serve as a model for the platforms the Republican and Democratic parties will write this summer. It can also serve as a blueprint for how those we elect can promote and protect the family and its values in 2009 and in the years to come.

The 25 goals we put forth here are grouped into eight main subject areas, ranging from Human Life to Marriage and Family to Religious Liberty to Culture and Media. Each page features a brief analysis of the issue, followed by one or more specific policy proposals which can help America meet that individual goal. Some involve action by Congress, some by the president, and some by state legislators or executive officials.

If you are a candidate for office or an elected official, please consider adopting these proposals as your own. If you are a values voter, challenge those running for office as to their position on these issues, and weigh their response as you consider your vote. If you are a pastor or leader of an organization, consider making copies of this booklet available to your members. If you are simply a citizen who cares about the family in America, write to your elected officials and urge them to pursue these goals with vigor.

As one would expect, the FRC then proceeds to lay out its policy priorities on everything from marriage to abortion to judges. If you are looking for a concise collection of the issues that make up the Right's current political agenda, this new FRC report is one-stop shopping.

Read the entire article here.

Protector of Marriage Has Illegitimate Child

Well, well .... a hypocrite as well as a bigot.

Are we surprised?

From PinkEBiz

A London civil servant who refused to perform civil partnerships for gay couples because of her fundamentalist Christian beliefs has apparently not let those beliefs govern her own sexual behavior outside of the office.

Lilian Ladele recently won a suit against Islington Council alleging discrimination after she was punished for refusing to do her job and perform civil partnerships for same-sex couples. A judge ruled that Ladele was within her rights to deny service to homosexuals as a staunch Christian.

However, it has now been revealed that Ladele is also a single mother to a child, now 27, born out of wedlock. So Ladele is so firmly Christian that she can’t possibly marry same-sex couples, but not so religious as to remain chaste until married. Presumably God will forgive the sin of extramarital sex but not the “sin” of joining two people together in a loving relationship.

The discovery that she has an illegitimate son could cast suspicion on some of the testimony she gave at the discrimination tribunal. The tribunal wrote: "Ms Ladele is a Christian. Her unchallenged evidence was that she holds the orthodox Christian view that marriage is the union of one man and one woman for life to the exclusion of all others and that marriage is the God-ordained place for sexual relations.”

"She told us that she believed this to be contrary to God's instructions that sexual relations belong exclusively between a man and a woman within marriage.

"That’s right, she said marriage is the only god-ordained place for sexual relations. How awkward for her. It’s likely even more awkward for the Christian Institute, a far-right Christian group that helped fund Ladele’s appeal and is firmly against sex before marriage.

However, it’s unlikely the group was unaware of the situation, once again proving that groups like the Christian Institute aren’t really “pro-Christian values”, just anti-gay. You can’t pick and choose your beliefs if you’re going to claim to be a fundamentalist. Hypocrisy is a sin itself.

Islington Council had promised to appeal the verdict immediately following their loss last week. Cllr John Gilbert said: "This isn't a decision we’ve taken lightly, but we believe an important question is at stake and the law must be clarified. Islington Council, like all councils and employers, needs to know whether we can expect employees to provide services to all sections of the community, regardless of who they are."This new revelation will most likely give them new ammunition. The council believed that Ladele was not properly cross-examined about the details of her religious faith. Details such as the fact that she won’t marry gays but will have sex out of wedlock could be potentially damning evidence against Ladele during an appeal.
[...]

The Right Goes All In to Stop Marriage Equality in California

Now more than ever it is vitally important to contribute to the battle against the religious fascists. Evan Wolfson has recommended that we send our contributions to Equality for All. I trust his advice implicitly.


The good people at Right Wing Watch are keeping up informed of what the religious fascists are doing to prevent equal treatment under the law for GLBT American citizens.



As we have noted over the last several weeks, the Religious Right’s response to the California marriage ruling has been noticeably over-the-top, even for them. Throwing out everything from Nazi metaphors and warnings that the end of the world was upon us to hateful language and ridiculous scare-tactics, the Right’s response has consisted almost entirely over rhetorical over-reaction.

But now that same-sex marriages have begun in California, the Right appears to be transitioning from over-reaction to action and begun ramping up its organizing efforts to amend the California Constitution to “provide that only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized.”

Just yesterday, the Los Angeles Times reported that Focus on the Family dumped a quarter-million dollars into the effort:

The initiative campaign proposes to amend the state Constitution to define marriage as being between a man and a woman. It received $250,000 this week from an evangelical group, Focus on the Family, and declared that the debate about same-sex marriage "is not over." Focus on the Family, led by James C. Dobson, posted a statement on its website declaring that California's "judicially imposed social experiment has hastened the demise of religious freedom across the U.S."

Today, the Family Research Council sent out an email seeking to have its own quarter-million dollar investment be doubled by a matching grant for the fight in California and across the nation:

I'm writing to ask you to give a generous donation to Family Research Council's MARRIAGE CAMPAIGN.

Your donation and others will be doubled by a Matching Grant up to $250,000!

Traditional marriage is now in grave peril across the nation due to the outrageous decisions by activist judges and radical legislators in Massachusetts, California, Vermont, Connecticut, New Jersey, New Hampshire and Oregon. With reckless disregard for logic and law, these threats open the door to:
* Counterfeit marriage being imposed on states with marriage amendments
* Erosion of traditional morality as homosexuality is normalized
* Schools teaching that homosexual behavior and homosexual "marriage" are social goods
* Restriction of religious freedom and free speech

In response to the marriage crisis, FRC has launched our Marriage Campaign.

Our initial goal: raise $2 million immediately to educate the nation on the centrality of marriage, respond to threats and lies across the country, educate leaders and pastors, and register voters.

The crisis is so great that FRC has been given a $250,000 Matching Grant to help fight this battle and others FRC plans to use the money is raises to, among other things, “Educate the grassroots and government leaders, Launch paid advertising and press events, Alert and inform FRC's powerful network of churches and Flood TV, radio, newspapers, and the Internet with FRC experts doing eye-opening interviews.”

The group through which FOF and FRC will presumably channel their money and efforts is ProtectMarriage.com, a who’s who of right-wing organizations and individuals.

ProtectMarriage itself appears to kicking its efforts into high-gear, beginning with what they seem to be billing as the single most important conference call ever:

Dear Pastors, Friends and Christian Leaders,

We have labored to make this letter as short as possible. However, the gravity of this moment caused us to need to share several critical items. Please read carefully – at least this first page.

The landscape of California will change dramatically as of Monday, June 16 at 5:01 PM. Every Bible believing pastor and church will be affected.

Please join with pastors and Christian leaders all across California who are coming together at 43+ locations for a statewide Pastors Strategic Conference Call, Wednesday, June 25, at 10 AM.

For the location list, please see www.protectmarriagesd.com.

If you, as a pastor, are willing to host a gathering of pastors and Christian leaders at your church, or you know of a pastor who will host, please contact Chris Clark at pastor@eastclairemont.com or 858-395-7136. You need to have speaker-phone capability that can be adequately amplified, along with PowerPoint capabilities for visual purposes.

Additionally, please forward this email to as many pastors and Christian leaders as you can or email reply with the email addresses of pastors and Christian leaders so that we can keep them informed of future developments … Be assured that the information shared will be extremely beneficial for the future of the cause of Christ in California. Saying it another way, it is worth canceling all other appointments in order to be present at one of these locations.

The conference call looks like it is tied to the organization’s efforts to use churches to register thousands of new voters before the November election:

The church in California is being called upon to turn out the vote for the November election, in which voters will vote on a constitutional amendment to nullify a recent court decision legalizing homosexual "marriage" in that state.

ProtectMarriage.com has already signed on a thousand churches to work to increase voter registration and turnout. As spokesman Ron Prentice notes, the church is seen as one of the keys to victory. "[In] many elections, only 50 percent of those church members register to vote," he says. "And so we know that our success hinges on getting out as many votes as possible -- and the church community is available and willing."

Prentice explains that as a follow-up to voter registration materials, his group will provide church leaders with specific sermon content on the subject of biblical marriage -- "and then we'll be working with them to get out more and more of their congregation to vote," he adds.

It seems as if it has finally dawned on the Right that a loss in California on the marriage issue could do serious damage to their efforts to pass a federal marriage amendment and permanently deny marriage equality to men and women throughout the nation and they look set to pull out all the stops in an effort to ensure that that does not happen. As AFA’s OneNewsNow put it: “History has shown that what happens in California affects the rest of the country, so Prentice is calling on people to pray for victory."

Jesus Made Me Puke

Matt Taibbi Undercover with the Christian Right

Matt Taibbi went undercover and joined John Hagee's church.

I had been attending the Cornerstone Church for weeks, but this was really my first day of school. I had joined Cornerstone — a megachurch in the Texas Hill Country — to get a look inside the evangelical mind-set that gave the country eight years of George W. Bush. The church's pastor, John Hagee, is one of the most influential evangelical preachers in the country — not because his ministry is so very large (although he claims up to 4.5 million viewers a week for his Sunday sermons) but because of his near-absolute conquest of a very trendy niche in the market: Christian Zionism.

The whole idea behind Christian Zionism is to align America with the nation of Israel so as to "hurry God up" in his efforts to bring about Armageddon. As Hagee tells it, only after Israel is involved in a final showdown involving a satanic army (in most interpretations, a force of Arabs led by Russians) will Christ reappear. On that happy day, Hagee and his True Believers will be whisked up to Heaven by God, while the rest of us nonbelievers are left behind on Earth to suck eggs and generally suffer various tortures.

He appeared on the Daily Show recently to share a bit of his experience.

There's lots more in his Rolling Stone article.

I was very, very, very good — at everything!" shouted our hulking ex-paratrooper pastor, Philip Fortenberry, into the barely visible mouth mike that curled around his ruddy face. "I was a Green Beret — top of the class. Six feet four, 225 pounds. A star athlete, basketball player. Starting outside linebacker on the varsity football team. . . ."

The crowd cooed as our spiritual leader rattled off his macho credentials. Our supercowboy pastor was the perfect foil for the Revenge of the Nerds-style crowd of fatties, addicts, loners and broken-home survivors populating the warehouse-size building where we were all destined to spend the next three days together. In his introductory speech, Fortenberry did everything but tape-measure his biceps. His autobiographical tale of an angry overachieving youth who fell into a young adulthood of false pride, only to rebound and be reborn as a turbocharged, Army-trained enemy of Satan ("A friend of mine once joked that he saw my picture hung up in a post office in Hell," he quipped), was to serve as the first chapter of our collective transformation — and to work it had to impress the hell out of us scraggly wanna-be's.
[...]

Throughout the whole weekend, Fortenberry had been setting himself up as an athletic conqueror of demons. Now, on the final morning, he looked like a quarterback about to take the field before a big game. The life coaches assembled around the edges of the chapel, carrying anointing oil and bundles of small paper bags.

Fortenberry began to issue instructions. He told us that under no circumstances should we pray during the Deliverance.

"When the word of God is in your mouth," he said, "the demons can't come out of your body. You have to keep a path clear for the demon to come up through your throat. So under no circumstances pray to God. You can't have God in your mouth. You can cough, you might even want to vomit, but don't pray."

The crowd nodded along solemnly. Fortenberry then explained that he was going to read from an extremely long list of demons and cast them out individually. As he did so, we were supposed to breathe out, keep our mouths open and let the demons out.
And he began.

At first, the whole scene was pure comedy. Fortenberry was standing up at the front of the chapel, reading off a list, and the room was loudly chirping crickets back at him.

"In the name of Jesus, I cast out the demon of incest! In the name of Jesus, I cast out the demon of sexual abuse! In the name of Jesus. . . ."

After a few minutes, there was a little twittering here and there. Nothing serious. I was beginning to think the Deliverance was going to be a bust.

But then it started. Wails and cries from the audience. To my left, a young black man started writhing around in his seat. In front of me and to my right, another young black man with Coke-bottle glasses and a shock of nerdly jheri curl — a dead ringer for a young Wayne Williams — started wailing and clutching his head.

"In the name of Jesus," continued Fortenberry, "I cast out the demon of astrology!"

Coughing and spitting noises. Behind me, a bald white man started to wheeze and gurgle, like he was about to puke. Fortenberry, still reading from his list, pointed at the man. On cue, a pair of life coaches raced over to him and began to minister. One dabbed his forehead with oil and fiercely clutched his cranium; the other held a paper bag in front of his mouth.

"In the name of Jesus Christ," said Fortenberry, more loudly now, "I cast out the demon of lust!"

And the man began power-puking into his paper baggie. I couldn't see if any actual vomitus came out, but he made real hurling and retching noises.

Now the women began to pipe in. On the women's side of the chapel the noises began, and it is not hard to explain what these noises sounded like. If you've ever watched The Houston 560 or any other gangbang porn movie, that's what it sounded like, only the sounds were far more intense.

It was not difficult to figure out where the energy was coming from on that side of the room. Some of the husbands glanced nervously over in the direction of their wives.

"In the name of Jesus Christ, I cast out the demon of cancer!" said Fortenberry.

"Oooh! Unnh! Unnnnnh!" wailed a woman in the front row.

"Bleeech!" puked the bald man behind me.

Within about a minute after that, the whole chapel erupted in pandemonium. About half the men and three-fourths of the women were writhing around and either play-puking or screaming. Not wanting to be a bad sport, I raised my hand for one of the life coaches to see.

"Need . . . a . . . bag," I said as he came over.

He handed me a bag.

"In the name of Jesus, I cast out the demon of handwriting analysis!" shouted Fortenberry.

Handwriting analysis? I jammed the bag over my mouth and started coughing, then went into a very real convulsion of disbelief as I listened to this astounding list, half-laughing and half-retching.

"In the name of Jesus Christ our Lord, I cast out the demon of the intellect!" Fortenberry continued. "In the name of Jesus, I cast out the demon of anal fissures!"

Be sure to read the entire article.

Hat tip Bilerico Project.

Has Bill O'Reilly Gotten a Clue?

Watch as anti-gay "family law attorney" Don Schweitzer tries to convince Bill O'Reilly that there's a good reason to oppose marriage equality. Billo just isn't buying it.

Hat tip to BradBlog

The ... ummm ... Humor? ... of the Wingnut Phobes.

Pam Spaulding found this one on the really creepy FreeRepublic.com site posted in response to the news of the California Supreme Court decision to overturn the gay marriage ban.

The Humor of the Right Wing Christian Conservatives.

Huckabee jokes about Obama ducking a gunman

During a speech before the National Rifle Association convention
Friday afternoon in Louisville, Kentucky, former Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee — who has endorsed presumptive GOP nominee John McCain — joked that an unexpected offstage noise was Democrat Barack Obama looking to avoid a gunman.

“That was Barack Obama, he just tripped off a chair, he's getting ready to speak,” said the former Arkansas governor, to audience laughter. “Somebody aimed a gun at him and he dove for the floor.”

Protecting Florida Children from Wizards

The article isnt' terribly informative about the source of the accusation, but could it really be anything other than one of those bizzare Christian Harry Potter phobes?

There's video of the wizard and his wizardry here.

Magic trick costs teacher job

Well, another Pasco County substitute teacher's job is on the line, but this time it's because of a magic trick.

The charge from the school district — Wizardry!

Substitute teacher Jim Piculas does a 30-second magic trick where a toothpick disappears then reappears.

But after performing it in front of a classroom at Rushe Middle School in Land O' Lakes, Piculas said his job did a disappearing act of its own.

"I get a call the middle of the day from the supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue. You can't take any more assignments. You need to come in right away,'" he said.

When Piculas went in, he learned his little magic trick cast a spell that went much farther than he'd hoped.

"I said, 'Well Pat, can you explain this to me?' 'You've been accused of wizardry,' [he said]. Wizardry?" he asked.

Doing Focus on the Family's Homework

I just love it when someone out there decides to do an extremist right-wing anti-gay activist organization’s homework for them.

It seems that Focus on the Family put out a real scary thing (at least in their little world of paranoia) about the vast funding behind the HRC and how HRC is working to implement the Gay Agenda. FOF even enlisted the mouthpiece of Concerned Women of America, Matt Barber, to scare us [koff] about the militant homosexual agenda while FOF’s Brad Miller scares us [koff] about HRC’s vast funding.

Well, it seems that Jim Burroway of Box Turtle Bulletin got a whiff of those old chestnuts and decided to do a bit of homework. And it turns out that Jim found that FOF’s funding is even more vast than HRC’s funding … About 3 times more vast than HRC’s, as a matter of fact.

Well, then a gentleman named John, the Average Gay Joe got interested in the whole funding thing and did a bunch of homework of his own to find out how vastly funded other gay groups are. And then he decided to find out how vastly funded other anti-gay groups are funded. And then he just could quit, so he looked up the vast funding of some veteran’s advocacy groups.

Thanks, guys … I love it when someone exposes the lies of the right wing crazies.

Michigan Marriage Safe From The Threat of Gay Health Insurance

Watch for a dramatic plummet in Michigan’s divorce rate and a long line of divorce lawyers at the unemployment office.

We always knew that health insurance is a major part of the gay agenda. Now comes the news that at least in Michigan, heterosexual marriage is finally safe from the threat of gay health insurance coverage.

Michigan Supreme Court says gay partners can't get health
benefits

LANSING -- A divided Michigan Supreme Court ruled Wednesday that a 2004 voter-approved ban against gay marriage also blocks governments and state universities from offering health insurance to the partners of gay workers.

The 5-2 decision affirms a state Court of Appeals ruling. In their opinion, the five majority justices ruled that "the marriage amendment...which states 'the union of one man and one woman in marriage shall be the only agreement recognized as a marriage of similar union for any purpose,' prohibits public employers from providing health-insurance benefits to their employees' qualified same-sex domestic partners." The 34-page opinion was authored by Justice Stephen Markman and signed by the court's other four Republicans as well.

As many as 20 public universities, community colleges, school districts and local governments in Michigan have benefits policies covering at least 375 gay couples. Some of the plans began as far back as the early 1990s. […]